mixed feelings

this past days have been an emotional rollercoaster. The though thing is nothing special has happened I almost feel guilty to to have so many mixed feelings and on top having negative feelings, like anger and sadness are badly seen on the adult community so showing them (my facial expression ussually betray me) makes me feel like I am being evaluated or in expectation tu mature. Like if feeling bad almost crying or frustrated is a crime. I know i amd blowing things out of proportion, but I have to admit being an anxious person isn´t easy. I work with children and I love it, but having to be a role model and being expected to have all of the answer is exousting. I feel like I have to say I am sorry for every feeling I have, and for being direct or expecting more out of people, yes grown people. For the last couple of months I have had to bemother and father for 6 out of 7 days of the week, and I know this is only the start with my husbands new profession, and I love to be part of his growth, but I have to admit I feel this is out of my reech. I see my son and I don´t regret having all this responsability, but I worry so much for him, for how he is perceived by others is one of my main issues, and I am very well aware that it sould not be, but when you are a teacher putting high expectations even when you try not to is kind of a stadarized thing. I see it in my olegues we want to have a loving, and happy child but we get confussed what happy and obedient is. WI am working on his happiness and not letting comments of his humanity get in the way of it, since those comments of my human feelings and in some way normal is getting in the way of mine.